last night i watched a really cool documentary called "Dark Star" about the artist who created the designs for Alien, H. R. Giger.
it was such a cool documentary, it brought up a lot of lost strong feelings about my own art. first off, i love movies, especially docs. when i was a kid it seemed like whatever you did or liked a little more than everyone else in your class was what you were gonna do when you got older. if you drew more than stick figures, you were THE artist of the class and you were gonna do whatever it is artists do when they leave school.
and not that she really changed my mind about making art but one conversation with my gramma sticks with me about it. she asked me what i wanted to be when i grew up and i told her i wanted to be an artist and she said that i couldnt actually do that seriously, it's not a real career, people dont actually make money doing that blah blah blah. that was the first time i ever heard something like that and now i feel that it's more common place for people to say that being an artist is a hobby, not a job type-thing. cause who was gonna tell me i would never make it anywhere with art when i was like ten?
but art has always been a constant in my life. of all the interests i've had, ive always been drawing full time or on the side. realizing that made me feel a lot of love for making art again. lately though, i feel like my work has kind of halted a bit. i'm not making huge leaps in progress like i once did, i'm kind of sticking to what i know. and it upsets me. i just aimlessly draw people.
watching that moving about H. R. Giger was so eye-opening. his work is so otherworldly and a game changer. i really feel like before Alien, there was nothing like that. so you kind of have to think about what his references and inspirations were. every other alien sci-fi back in the 80s didnt resemble Alien at all. i feel like Giger just brought this totally overwhelming.. ominous feeling to "aliens". they're creatures, they're haunting. you know, they're not little skinny grey dudes with big eyes.
there's so much more feeling behind his art than just drawing what's easy. in the doc, he says something along the lines of "I don't draw this stuff to indulge in it, i draw it because it scares me so much."
that made me think that a huge part of making "good" art, art that evokes intense feelings in other people without explanation, is drawing what makes you uncomfortable. drawing things that you think but don't talk about.
anyway thank you for reading if you did <3